Crock-Pot Taco Chili or Wait, you can screw up chili?

Imagine if you will the scene: Wide open Texan plains - Late 1800s. A Tuesday. Dusk. A group of cowboys have just finished a long day of cattle herding and are looking forward to a good meal to consume from the comfort of a warm campfire. An aged weather-worn cook is preparing an extra large serving of hearty chili to rejuvenate himself and his compadres over stories of days long past with a serving of hard whiskey.

The group situates themselves in a half circle and ladle up a heaping bowl full of the aromatic goodness and dig in. However, something about the meal just doesn't sit right with Dusty. The spoon full of the foodstuff coating the inside of his gaping maw is off- something is missing. Somewhere deep within Dusty's quickly firing synapses two neurons make that vital electro-chemical connection resulting in a memory bubbling to the surface of awareness culminating in realization. In uncontrollable anger Dusty raises to his feet and glares at the cook.

"If I've warned you once I've warned you a thousand times. Chili at its core is defined by the goddamn water chestnuts and almond slivers! What do you think we are, vermin?!"

With a flick of the wrist Dusty draws his sidearm and in a flash the cook lies dead. None of the other cowboys think Dusty to be in the wrong. After all, what is chili without the fucking nuts? And don't even get them started on the missing olives...

End Scene.

Now, hopefully that the over the top scene illustrates just what's wrong with the Crock-Pot Taco Chili. Chili is defined by the combination of several simple ingredients, and the proportions of these ingredients with simple spices brew up a wonderful concoction that teases the tastebuds with both flavor and heat. Whoever came up with the idea of adding olives and nuts to a batch of chili is just as nutty as the two offending ingredients. (Bad joke, but it's late... have mercy. (End Full House reference.)) Not only that, but technically this isn't chili- It's tacos without the shells (hard or soft depending on your personal preference).

Let's move on though shall we? This meal is supposed to be easy right? Just toss all the shit in the crock pot and go. The only problem with this easy recipe is that it requires precooking the ground beef before hand. So instantly this recipe is graduated from a "just a crock pot meal" to "just a crock pot and one pan" meal.  Oh, what a tangle web of lies we weave with these Meal Planning Mommies and Pals.

Anyway, I'm tired after a long day of working- which is another reason why this meal doesn't work for anyone with a family of working parents. Cook for 4 hours? On a weekday? So which parent is going to take off of work at noon to drive home in order to put this crap-in-a-pot together? Not me that's for sure. I'd rather give an easy 20 minutes of prep time after a long day of working to prepare something fresh and delicious instead of a bowl of sodium con carne.

I'm done.

MPM Fail Scale Rating: π (3.14159...)